The line between sadness and depression is often a blurry one. It can become even more unclear when it comes to kids. That’s because the signs of childhood depression – such as irritability and short-temperedness – can seem like the normal mood swings of an angsty teen or impatient child.
But when do these signs cross into dangerous territory? Most experts say that if the symptoms last longer than 2 weeks, your child might be dealing with depression. As always, this isn’t a hard-and-fast rule. But it’s a good rule of thumb to keep in mind if you’re worried about your child.
Childhood depression often goes undiagnosed, which means many kids are suffering through it alone. But they don’t have to be. Being aware of the signs of childhood depression is the first step in intervening early.
Common Signs of Childhood Depression
Depression can present differently in children than adults, which might make it that much more difficult to spot. Like many mental illnesses, it’s not always immediately obvious if what seems like a problem to you is actually a problem.
So is your child’s sadness more than just sadness? Here are some common signs of childhood depression to be on the lookout for.
Irritability
It’s normal for kids to go through periods of irritability and moodiness. However, if this persists for a prolonged period of time – weeks or months, this could be a warning sign.
In fact, irritability is one of the most commonly missed signs of childhood depression. Parents usually associate depression with sadness. They don’t always make the connection between irritability and depression.
Since kids and younger adolescents may not be able to make sense of their depression or even have the words to identify the feeling, it often comes out in bursts of short-temperedness or irritability.
Physical Symptoms
The second most commonly missed sign of childhood depression is physical symptoms such as headaches, stomach pains, or trouble sleeping. These symptoms are unrelated to the child’s physical health and have no other explanation.
When your child comes to you and says they have a headache, your reaction is to treat the symptom as the problem. However, physical symptoms can be the result of a bigger problem. If your child is experiencing inexplicable physical symptoms on a regular basis, and it’s not improving over time, it would be helpful to consider another explanation.
Lack of Energy
No, we’re not talking about lack of energy in the mornings or right before you tell your children to clean their room – we are talking about a persistent lack of energy or motivation to do things, even a simple task.
If you’ve noticed that your child is getting an adequate amount of sleep, but is still waking up tired and depleted of energy, there might be something more serious at play here.
Sadness
Being sad is a normal part of the human experience – for both children and adults. If your child is experiencing a difficult moment in their life, such as a transition or a loss, it may result in a temporary period of sadness.
When it comes to depression, however, sadness is not usually associated with a specific event or life change. Children with depression often report an overall sadness about life and the future in general. Persistent and unexplainable feelings of sadness could signal a problem.
Loss of Interest in Activities They Used to Enjoy
Growing up means losing interest in certain activities over time. This shouldn’t cause you any concern. However, if you notice that your child doesn’t find joy in any activities they once enjoyed, that’s when it may signal a problem.
Some level of apathy when it comes to pre-teens or adolescents is also normal. However, it’s important to watch for signs of your children not being emotionally or mentally present in situations. To an observer, it can look like your child is running on autopilot – functioning only because they have to.
More Signs of Childhood Depression
- Difficulty Concentrating
- Withdrawing from Friends and Family
- Persistent Negative Thoughts
- Feelings of Hopelessness
- Low Self Esteem
- Anger
- Decline in School Performance
- Impulsive or risky behavior (in teens)
Helping a Child With Depression
It’s hard to see your child struggle. It’s even harder when you can’t pinpoint a straightforward solution to their problems. While you might not have the “cure”, there are certainly things you can do as a parent to support your child.
Be Open to Talking About Feelings
Depression is a disease that hides in the shadows – often until it’s too late. Your child might feel embarrassed or ashamed to come to you with their feelings.
That’s why it’s important to create an environment where any and all feelings are accepted – even negative ones. Children who are taught that their feelings don’t matter may try to hide their struggles from their parents out of fear of judgment. This can often lead to more serious risks later on.
Set the tone in your household that feelings can be freely shared without punishment or judgement.
Don’t Minimize Their Struggles
Even if you don’t understand what your child is going through, it is absolutely crucial not to minimize what they’re experiencing. For people who don’t struggle with depression, it can be hard to wrap your head around the disease.
At the core of it, depression is a medical condition that can be managed with treatment and medication. If your child was diagnosed with diabetes or epilepsy, you wouldn’t question whether they were “exaggerating” their condition or making things up.
One of the worst things you could do as a parent is to minimize what your child is going through. This may cause them to feel further guilt and shame about their depression – feelings they’re already most likely dealing with.
Consult a Licensed Professional
If you don’t see any improvements in your child’s behavior, and you’ve done everything you can to reassure and support them, it may be time to call a licensed professional for help.
Let’s make it clear that even supermoms and dads may not be able to give their depressed child the support they need. That says nothing about their parenting abilities and everything about the debilitating nature of the illness.
Help Your Child Thrive Again
Getting your child the help they need can be the start of a new chapter in their life. Depression is sometimes described as seeing the world devoid of color. When you have depression, it’s hard to imagine how and when you’ll ever experience joy and happiness again.
But it is possible. And it is within reach for your child. The journey to healing can start with a simple phone call or email. You call, we match you, it really is that easy.
Help your child see the world in color again. Central Texas Child and Family Counseling is here to support you and your child along this journey. We have convenient locations in Georgetown and Liberty Hill. Don’t hesitate to reach out today.
Here for you,
-Jenna
