When it comes to calming techniques for kids with anxiety, you have to remember that coping methods for adults likely won’t make sense to a 6-year-old. Telling your child to “reframe their perspective” or “break their negative thought patterns” would sound like gibberish to them.
This isn’t to say that children aren’t smart enough to understand their own anxiety or anxious thought patterns. This is just to say that coping methods that are more complicated may be less effective than simple, easy-to-learn methods.
Thankfully, there are coping methods for every age and comprehension level. Teaching your anxious child calming techniques they can use in the moment can help them feel more prepared and give them the skills they need to manage their anxiety in the future.
1. Breathing Exercises
There’s really no overstating the importance of focusing on the breath when it comes to anxiety. It’s one of the quickest ways to calm your child and bring them back to center.
Consider teaching your child the box breathing method, which is one of the easiest to learn and remember. Thinking of a box with 4 sides can serve as a visual reminder of how to complete this practice.
- Take a deep breath in to the count of 4
- Hold the breath in your lungs for a count of 4
- Slowly exhale to the count of 4
- Take a pause for a count of 4
And that’s it! Your child should repeat this practice until their heart rate slows and their breathing returns to normal. It may be helpful to encourage your child to complete a certain number of cycles of this breathing exercise when they are still new to this practice. This can help give them some kind of structure to follow and can even be a source of distraction from their anxiety.
2. Use a Grounding Technique
Anxiety often manifests as worries about the future – something that cannot be controlled in the present. With that being said, it’s important to teach your child how to bring their mind and body back to the present. This can be done through a grounding technique.
Grounding techniques are a great way to remind your child that they’re here, they’re okay, and they’re safe.
One grounding technique that is super simple for kids to learn is the 5-4-3-2-1 technique. In this exercise, ask your child to either say or think to themselves:
- 5 things they can see in the present moment
- 4 things they can touch
- 3 things they can hear
- 2 things they can smell
- 1 thing they can taste
And if your child is not currently touching 4 things, encourage them to reach out and grab onto something – the carpet, the grass, their sweater.
Engaging in this practice is meant to help your child be more connected with the present and not focus on things that are either intangible or uncontrollable at the moment.
After this exercise, remind your child that they’re safe and okay in the moment. The point is not to completely take away their worries, but to help pull them back to the present.
3. Do An Activity
Anxiety is characterized by repetitive, worrying thoughts. If your child gets in the habit of ruminating on their anxious thoughts, this can make their anxiety worse. One of the simplest calming techniques for kids is to encourage them to engage in an activity that will take the focus away from their anxiety.
Creative activities, such as drawing or journaling, can help them redirect their anxious energy elsewhere. It is also a wonderful way for them to express their anxiety and maybe even let go of it in the process.
Here are some other suggestions for calming activities that can offer relief from anxious thoughts:
- Coloring
- Painting
- Doing a puzzle
- Reading a book
- Taking a bath
- Building a fort
- Eating a snack/drinking water
4. Change Scenery
Many times, staying in the environment where your anxiety manifests can actually make it harder to get out of it. For this reason, it could be helpful to suggest a change in location to your child.
This could mean a quick walk around the block or even just changing rooms. Moving from a chaotic environment with lots of noises, lights, and movement to a calm space can help your child calm down.
Our surroundings have a real impact on our mental state, so it’s generally worth giving try and seeing how your child responds.
5. Have a Comfort Object
Comfort objects like stuffed animals and blankets have been used for years to help children cope with their fears and worries. In many ways, comfort objects are similar to a grounding technique.
It’s a physical object that your child can touch or hold to remind themselves that things will be okay. It again pulls your child into the present and away from their anxious thoughts.
A necklace, wristband, or stress ball can act in a similar way to stuffed animals. The benefit of a small, portable or wearable item is that your child can carry this with them wherever they go and have the reassurance that this object will be there when they need it.
6. Use Rituals or Mantras
Children can benefit from rituals or mantras as an easy way to break negative thought patterns. These practices can distract from what’s going on in their mind and bring them back to their body.
Here are some easy calming techniques for kids they can practice anywhere:
- Do some light stretching
- Count backwards from 100
- Say your ABCs
- Name 3 things you like about yourself
- Name 3 things you’re grateful for
- Close your eyes and visualize your favorite place in the world
7. Get Moving
When your child is anxious, you may be able to see that they’re visibly agitated. Maybe they’re crying, throwing their toys around, or stomping their feet.
Your children may be experiencing an abundance of adrenaline from their anxiety. Anxiety engages your flight-or-fight response, which causes your body to release adrenaline and other stress hormones.
To help your child calm down immediately, suggest that they go for a walk in fresh air or take a bike ride around the neighborhood. Movement/exercise will help your child release their pent-up energy and can stabilize their mood.
8. Talk About It
Lastly, as many adults who struggle with anxiety know, talking it out can often make you feel instantly better. That’s why we have our best friend on speed dial or schedule weekly sessions with our therapist.
Our kids can benefit from talking it out as well. They may not be used to reaching out for help yet, so you may need to prompt them with supportive statements and questions before they feel comfortable talking. Saying things like ‘I love you’ and ‘I’m here for you, how can I help’? is a great starting place and may be all it takes to get your little one to open up.
If you’re having a hard time calming your child down and their anxiety seems to be getting worse, speaking to a licensed professional can help. Kids who have trouble verbalizing their thoughts and feelings may need a little guidance. There’s no shame in seeking help. It can actually lead to better coping methods in the future.
Looking for More Calming Techniques for Kids?
If nothing seems to be calming your child down or if you need support helping your child, you may want to explore counseling options. Central Texas Child and Family offers personalized counseling for anxious children of all different ages and personalities.
You don’t have to struggle alone – help is within reach. Let us do all the work – simply give us a call, and we’ll match you to one of our licensed professionals. Then we’ll book you for an initial consult. Our offices are conveniently located in both the Georgetown and Liberty HIll area. We look forward to serving you!
Rooting for you,
-Jenna
